Chuck Norris Dead?

[Peelz]

Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.

or stood still! the bulls ran away in horror!

[Krandall]

"Brokeback Mountain" is not just a movie. It's also what Chuck Norris calls the pile of dead ninjas in his front yard. 

[Colorado700R]

Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.

I like this version...


Chuck Norris once participated in the "Running of the Bulls".  He was asked not to return.


The "Cowering of the Steers" just didn't sound right.

[kyledvor61]

Chuck Norris once participated in the running of the bulls. He walked.

I like this version...


Chuck Norris once participated in the "Running of the Bulls".  He was asked not to return.


The "Cowering of the Steers" just didn't sound right.

Chuck Norris is the reason the bulls run

[darkside94]

Colorado's version sounds best
but its whatever Chuck Norris wants it to be
and you better laugh

[NaturalRaptor]

Some have been posted but some have not,

If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.

There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.

Apple pays Chuck Norris 99 cents every time he listens to a song.

Chuck Norris can sneeze with his eyes open.

Chuck Norris can eat just one Lay's potato chip.

Chuck Norris is suing Myspace for taking the name of what he calls everything around you.

Chuck Norris destroyed the periodic table, because he only recognizes the element of surprise.

Chuck Norris can kill two stones with one bird.

When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night, he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris does not sleep. He waits.

Chuck Norris is currently suing NBC, claiming Law and Order are trademarked names for his left and right legs.

Chuck Norris is the reason why Waldo is hiding.

Chuck Norris counted to infinity - twice.

There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.

When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he isn't lifting himself up, he's pushing the Earth down.

Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.

Chuck Norris' hand is the only hand that can beat a Royal Flush.

Chuck Norris can lead a horse to water AND make it drink.

Chuck Norris doesn't wear a watch, HE decides what time it is.

Chuck Norris can slam a revolving door.

Chuck Norris does not get frostbite. Chuck Norris bites frost

Remember the Soviet Union? They decided to quit after watching a DeltaForce marathon on Satellite TV.

Contrary to popular belief, America is not a democracy, it is a Chucktatorship.

When Chuck Norris calls 1-900 numbers, he doesnt get charged. He holds up the phone and money falls out.

[BRAD]

Chuck Norris - enough said

[Colorado700R]

Chuck Norris was the 4th wiseman. He gave Jesus the gift of Beard, which Jesus wore proudly until his dying day. The other 3 wisemen were so jealous they had him omitted from the Bible. All three died soon after from mysterious roundhouse kick related deaths.

[Lady4Fiddy]

Chuck Norris will always live in my heart!   

[Krandall]

They were going to release a Chuck Norris edition of Clue, but the answer always turns out to be "Chuck Norris. In The Library. With a Roundhouse Kick."

[Peelz]

Chuck Norris - enough said

Who is dis guy?   ^^^^

[Danny T]

lol i just read all 10 pages, too funny

[Out Back Welding]

couple favorites of mine:

Chuck Norris invented water!

Chuck Norris never has sex on bottom, because chuck never fucks up!