Post some good jokes here!!!!

[Krandall]

A man is flying in a hot air balloon and realizes he is lost. He reduces height and spots a man down below. He lowers the balloon further and shouts, "Excuse me, can you tell me where I am?"

The man below says, "Yes. You're in a hot air balloon, hovering 30 feet above this field."

"You must work in information technology" says the balloonist.

"I do," replies the man, "How did you know?"

"Well," says the balloonist, "Everything you have told me is technically correct, but it's of no use to anyone."

The man below says, "You must work in business."

"I do," replies the balloonist, "but how did you know?"

"Well," says the man: "You don't know where you are, or where you're going, but you expect me to be able to help. You're in the same position you were before we met, but now it's my fault."

[Hefe]

A Baptist Preacher was seated next to Peels on a flight to Iowa . After the plane took off, Peels asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the preacher if he would like a drink. Appalled, the preacher replied, "I'd rather be tied up and taken advantage of by homosexual prostitutes, than let liquor touch my lips."

Peels then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice

[Peelz]

A Baptist Preacher was seated next to Peels on a flight to Iowa . After the plane took off, Peels asked for a whiskey and soda, which was brought and placed before him. The flight attendant then asked the preacher if he would like a drink. Appalled, the preacher replied, "I'd rather be tied up and taken advantage of by homosexual prostitutes, than let liquor touch my lips."

Peels then handed his drink back to the attendant and said, "Me too, I didn't know we had a choice

tell me you wouldnt have to at least give it a thought....   

[Hefe]

I'm In

[Bert]

Written across the wall of the cave were the following symbols:
It was considered a unique find and the writings were said to be at
least 3000 years old!

The piece of stone was removed, brought to the museum, and
archaeologists from around the world came to study the ancient
symbols.

They held a huge meeting after months of conferences to discuss the
meaning of the markings.

The President of the society pointed to first drawing and said:

"This is a woman. We can see these people held women in high esteem.

You can also tell they were intelligent, as the next symbol is a
donkey, so they were smart enough to have animals help them till the
soil.

The next drawing is a shovel, which means they had tools to help them."

Even further proof of their high intelligence is the fish which means
that if a famine hit the earth and food didn't grow, they seek food
from the sea.

The last symbol appears to be the Star of David which means they were
evidently Hebrews.

The audience
applauded enthusiastically.

Then a little old Jewish man stood up in the back of the room and said,

"Idiots...Hebrew is read from right to left.... It says: 'Holy
Mackerel, Dig The Ass On That Chick"

[Colorado700R]

[Segkast]

I know the title says 'good jokes' ... but I made a good bad joke today lol


[Today at 02:29:01 PM] Adam: 50 earth quakes a year in OK pre 2009

[Today at 02:29:17 PM] Adam: went up to 1k

[Today at 02:29:27 PM] Adam: thats one hell of a jump

[Today at 02:30:17 PM] Segkast: bah, what's a lil shakin anyway eh ?

[Today at 02:31:42 PM] Segkast:  

[Today at 02:32:26 PM] Segkast: besides, if they keep having more and more, I blame the people of OK

[Today at 02:32:29 PM] Adam: and the first ever nation wide emergency alert will be conducted in a few days

[Today at 02:32:46 PM] Segkast: It's their fault  

[Today at 02:32:57 PM] Adam: EVER IN HISTORY OF THE USA

[Today at 02:32:59 PM] Segkast:  See what I did there Peelsy ?  

[Peelz]

am I missing something?? ....i do not "see what you did there" Except insulted the people of Oklahoma.

jerk 

[Troy]

read it a couple more times Peels, it'll come to ya    lol

[Magz]

I dont get it either    

[Troy]

re read the "it's their fault" part again, it'll come to you I promise lol.

[Spartan]

Fault lines?

[Krandall]

I got it

yay me!

[Krandall]

A schoolgirl approaches her mother and announces, "Mommy, I know where babies come from!"

"And where is that?" her mother asks.

"Well, Mommy and Daddy take their clothes off and Daddy's thingy sort of sticks out and Mommy puts it in her mouth and that's how you get babies," she explains.

"Oh darling, that's so sweet, but that's not how we get babies," her mother replies, "That's how we get flowers, jewelry, clothes and shoes!"

[Peelz]

Fault lines?

ZING!!! HEY OH! BA DUM CRISH!!!!!!




needed a before the word fault