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Other/Off-Topic => Off-Topic => Topic started by: dragonz on August 11, 2008, 03:07:12 AM

Title: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 11, 2008, 03:07:12 AM
New Words for 2008

* SALAD DODGER.
An excellent phrase for an overweight person.

* SWAMP-DONKEY
A deeply unattractive person.

* TESTICULATING.
Waving your arms around and talking bollocks.

* BLAMESTORMING.
Sitting round in a group, discussing why a deadline was missed or a
project failed, and who was responsible.

* SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and
Then leaves.

* SALMON DAY.
The experience of spending an entire day swimming upstream only to get
screwed and die.

* CUBE FARM.
An office filled with cubicles.

* PRAIRIE DOGGING.
When someone yells or drops something loudly in a cube farm, and
people's heads pop up over the walls to see what's going on. (This also
applies to applause for a promotion because there may be cake.)

* SINBAD.
Single working girls. Single income, no boyfriend and desperate.

* AEROPLANE BLONDE.
One who has bleached/dyed her hair but still has a 'black box'.

* PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE.
The fine art of whacking the crap out of an electronic device to get it
to work again.

* AUSSIE KISS.
Similar to a French Kiss, but given down under.

* OH - NO SECOND.
That minuscule fraction of time in which you realize that you've just
made a BIG mistake (e.g. you've hit 'reply all').

* GREYHOUND.
A very short skirt, only an inch from the hare.

* JOHNNY-NO-STARS.
A young man of substandard intelligence, the typical adolescent who
works in a burger restaurant. The 'no-stars' comes from the badges
displaying stars that staff at fast-food rest au rants often wear to show
their level of training.

* MILLENNIUM DOMES.
The contents of a Wonderbra, i.e. extremely impressive when viewed from
the outside, but there's actually naught in there worth seeing.

* MONKEY BATH .
A bath so hot, that when lowering yourself in, you go: 'Oo! Oo! Oo!
Aa! Aa! Aa!'.

* MYSTERY BUS.
The bus that arrives at the pub on Friday night while you're in the
toilet after your 10th pint, and whisks away all the unattractive people so
the pub is suddenly packed with stunners when you come back in.

* MYSTERY TAXI.
The taxi that arrives at your place on Saturday morning before you wake
up, whisks away the stunner you slept with, and leaves a 10-Pinter in your
bed instead.

* BEER COAT.
The invisible but warm coat worn when walking home after a booze cruise
At 3:00am .

* BEER COMPASS.
The invisible device that ensures your safe arrival home after booze
cruise, even though you're too drunk to remember where you live, how
you got here, and where you've come from.

* BREAKING THE SEAL.
Your first pee in the pub, usually after 2 hours of drinking. After
breaking the seal of your bladder, repeat visits to the toilet will be
required every 10 or 15 minutes for the rest of the night.

* TART FUEL.
Bottled premixed spirits, regularly consumed by young women.

* TRAMP STAMP
Tattoo on a female

* PICASSO BUM.
A woman whose knickers are too small for her, so she looks like she's
got 4 buttocks

;)Dragonz
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Bert on August 11, 2008, 06:37:49 AM
PRAIRIE DOGGING - I bet that's funny to watch
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 11, 2008, 07:21:03 AM
 :lol:  good find.
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: BRAD on August 11, 2008, 08:12:09 AM
:lol: good find man
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 11, 2008, 08:42:46 AM
* SEAGULL MANAGER.
A manager who flies in, makes a lot of noise, craps on everything, and
Then leaves.


we've got one of those here... :mad:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Flynbyu on August 11, 2008, 10:37:01 AM
Welcome back Phil!

~Brian
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Sand84 on August 11, 2008, 01:17:52 PM
Thats great :clap:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: kyledvor61 on August 11, 2008, 03:57:03 PM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 12, 2008, 04:50:18 AM
Quote from: Flynbyu on August 11, 2008, 10:37:01 AM
Welcome back Phil!

~Brian
Was pretty un-impressed with the whole RF thing, & was not too interested in trying to re-establish a profile on another raptor forum, but figure I should still be sociable with the people I knew.
Miss some of the goof-ball stuff that used to happen, random whores from Webb & the like, but ain't about to stump up for "VIP" or anything like that, so guess you'll have to make do with the odd random pm from me & the occasional bit of humor from down-under
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 12, 2008, 04:54:53 AM
THE JOURNEY OF MAN

When I was 14, I hoped that one day I would have a girlfriend.

When I was 16 I got a girlfriend, but there was no passion, so I decided I needed a passionate girl with a zest for life.

In college I dated a passionate girl, but she was too emotional. Everything was an emergency; she was a drama queen, cried all the time and threatened suicide. So I decided I needed a girl with stability.

When I was 25 I found a very stable girl but she was boring. She was totally predictable and never got excited about anything. Life became so dull that I decided that I needed a girl with some excitement.

When I was 28 I found an exciting girl, but I couldn't keep up with her. She rushed from one thing to another, never settling on anything. She did mad impetuous things and made me miserable as often as happy. She was great fun initially and very energetic, but directionless. So I decided to find a girl with some real ambition.

When I turned 30, I found a smart ambitious girl with her feet planted firmly on the ground, so I married her. She was so ambitious that she divorced me and took everything I owned.

I am older and wiser now, and am looking for a girl with big tits  8)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 12, 2008, 10:09:46 AM
 :rofl:

Words of the wise. by Phil the Kiwi
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Flynbyu on August 12, 2008, 10:13:28 AM
Quote from: dragonz on August 12, 2008, 04:50:18 AM
Quote from: Flynbyu on August 11, 2008, 10:37:01 AM
Welcome back Phil!

~Brian
Was pretty un-impressed with the whole RF thing, & was not too interested in trying to re-establish a profile on another raptor forum, but figure I should still be sociable with the people I knew.
Miss some of the goof-ball stuff that used to happen, random whores from Webb & the like, but ain't about to stump up for "VIP" or anything like that, so guess you'll have to make do with the odd random pm from me & the occasional bit of humor from down-under

That would be greatly appreciated Phil. Webb is still floating around. I talked to him via phone last week.

~Brian
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: exentix on August 12, 2008, 01:02:34 PM
haha nice  :lol:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: kyledvor61 on August 12, 2008, 10:17:34 PM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 12, 2008, 11:35:06 PM
Semi random whore type thing................

Best Bridal Gown ever!!


[attachment deleted by admin]
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 12, 2008, 11:47:56 PM
International Rules Of Manhood

1: Under no circumstances may two men share an umbrella.

2: It is OK for a man to cry ONLY under the following circumstances:
(a) When a heroic dog dies to save its master.
(b) The moment Angelina Jolie starts unbuttoning her blouse.
(c) After wrecking your boss' car.
(d) One hour, 12 minutes, 37 seconds into "The Crying Game".
(e) When she is using her teeth.

3: Any Man who brings a camera to a bachelor party may be legally killed and eaten by his buddies.

4: Unless he murdered someone in your family, you must bail a friend out of jail within 12 hours.

5: If you've known a guy for more than 24 hours, his sister is off limits forever unless you actually marry her.

6: Moaning about the brand of free beer in a buddy's fridge is forbidden. However complain at will if the temperature is unsuitable.

7: No man shall ever be required to buy a birthday present for another man. In fact, even remembering your buddy's birthday is strictly optional. At that point, you must celebrate at a strip bar of the birthday boy's choice.

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest.

9: When stumbling upon other guys watching a sporting event, you may ask the score of the game in progress, but you may never ask who's playing.

10: It is permissible to drink a fruity alcohol drink only when you're sunning on a tropical beach...and it's delivered by a topless model and only when it's free.

11: Unless you're in prison, never fight naked.

12: friends don't let friends wear Speedos. Ever. Issue closed.

13: Women who claim they "love to watch sports" must be treated as spies until they demonstrate knowledge of the game and the ability to drink as much as the other sports watchers.

14: Never hesitate to reach for the last beer or the last slice of pizza, but not both, that's just greedy.

15: If you compliment a guy on his six-pack, you'd better be talking about his choice of beer.

16: Never join your girlfriend or wife in discussing a friend of yours, except if she's withholding sex pending your response.

17: Phrases that may NOT be uttered to another man while lifting weights:
(a) Yeah, Baby, Push it!
(b) C'mon, give me one more! Harder!
(c) Another set and we can hit the showers!

18: Never talk to a man in a bathroom unless you are on equal footing: i.e., both urinating, both waiting in line, etc. For all other imperceptible nod is all the conversation you need.

19: Never allow a telephone conversation with a woman to go on longer than you are able to have sex with her. Keep a stopwatch by the phone. Hang up if necessary.

20: The morning after you and a girl who was formerly "just a friend" have carnal, drunken monkey sex, the fact that you're feeling weird and guilty is no reason for you not to nail each other again before the discussion about what a big mistake it was occurs.

21: It is acceptable for you to drive her car. It is not acceptable for her to drive yours.

22: Thou shalt not buy a car in the colors of brown, pink, lime green, orange or sky blue.

23: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.

24: There is no reason for guys to watch Ice Skating or Men's Gymnastics. Ever.

We've all heard about people having guts or balls. But do you really know the difference between them? In an effort to keep you informed, the definition of each is listed below.

"GUTS" is arriving home late after a night out with the guys, being assaulted by your wife with a broom, and having the guts to say, "Are you still cleaning or are you flying somewhere?"

"BALLS" is coming home late after a night out with the guys smelling of perfume and beer, lipstick on your collar, slapping your wife on the ass and having the balls to say, "You're next!"

We hope this clears up any confusion.

The International Council of Manhood, Ltd.
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 13, 2008, 04:17:29 AM
What is Australia like.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The questions below about Australia, are from potential visitors. They were posted on an Australian Tourism Website and the answers are the actual responses by the website officials, who obviously have a sense of humour.







Q: Does it ever get windy in Australia? I have never seen it rain on TV, how do the plants grow? (UK).
A: We import all plants fully grown and then just sit around watching them die.



Q: Will I be able to see kangaroos in the street? (USA)
A: Depends how much you've been drinking.



Q: I want to walk from Perth to Sydney - can I follow the railroad tracks? (Sweden)
A: Sure, it's only three thousand miles; take lots of water.



Q: Is it safe to run around in the bushes in Australia? (Sweden)
A: So it's true what they say about Swedes.



Q: Are there any ATMs (cash machines) in Australia? Can you send me a list of them in Brisbane, Cairns, Townsville and Hervey Bay? (UK)
A: What did your last slave die of?



Q: Can you give me some information about hippo racing in Australia? (USA)
A: A-fri-ca is the big triangle shaped continent south of Europe. Aus-tra-lia is that big island in the middle of the Pacific which does not... oh forget it. Sure, the hippo racing is every Tuesday night in Kings Cross. Come naked.



Q: Which direction is North in Australia? (USA)
A: Face south and then turn 180 degrees. Contact us when you get here and we'll send the rest of the directions.



Q: Can I bring cutlery into Australia? (UK)
A: Why? Just use your fingers like we do.



Q: Can you send me the Vienna Boys' Choir schedule? (USA)
A: Aus-tri-a is that quaint little country bordering Ger-man-y, which is...oh forget it. Sure, the Vienna Boys Choir plays every Tuesday night in Kings Cross, straight after the hippo races. Come naked.



Q: Can I wear high heels in Australia? ( UK)
A: You are a British politician, right?



Q: Are there supermarkets in Sydney and is milk available all year round? (Germany)
A: No, we are a peaceful civilization of vegan hunter/gatherers. Milk is illegal.



Q: Please send a list of all doctors in Australia who can dispense rattlesnake serum. (USA)
A: Rattlesnakes live in A-meri-ca which is where YOU come from. All Australian snakes are perfectly harmless, can be safely handled and make
good pets.



Q: I have a question about a famous animal in Australia, but I forget its name. It's a kind of bear and lives in trees. (USA)
A: It's called a Drop Bear. They are so called because they drop out of Gumtrees and eat the brains of anyone walking underneath them. You can scare
them off by spraying yourself with human urine before you go out walking.



Q: Do you have perfume in Australia? (France)
A: No, WE don't stink.



Q: I have developed a new product that is the fountain of youth. Can you tell me where I can sell it in Australia? (USA)
A: Anywhere significant numbers of Americans gather.



Q: Can you tell me the regions in Tasmania where the female population is smaller than the male population? (Italy)
A: Yes, gay nightclubs.



Q: Do you celebrate Christmas in Australia? (France)
A: Only at Christmas.



Q: I was in Australia in 1969 on R+R, and I want to contact the girl I dated while I was staying in Kings Cross. Can you help? (USA)
A: Yes, and you will still have to pay her by the hour.



Q: Will I be able to speak English most places I go? (USA)
A: Yes, but you'll have to learn it first.

You see why we don't like the aussies much?!
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: exentix on August 13, 2008, 06:55:29 AM
thats great!  :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 08:53:27 AM
23: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.


That's awesome!!!!!


And perth to Sydney.. would take FOREVER :lol:

Perth is on my list for next winter. 8)

Phil what part of NZ are you in?
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 08:59:24 AM
haha dragonz. saw those before, gotta add one.

Never, ever use the middle urinal or sink, if there are only three, and all are open, in the men's restroom. :lol:

this one is good:

8: On a road trip, the strongest bladder determines pit stops, not the weakest. 

I have an iron bladder-NO STOPPING!  :lol:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: BRAD on August 13, 2008, 09:15:14 AM
:rofl: good ones
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 13, 2008, 01:30:10 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 08:53:27 AM
23: The girl who replies to the question "What do you want for Christmas?" with "If you loved me, you'd know what I want!" gets an Xbox. End of story.


That's awesome!!!!!


And perth to Sydney.. would take FOREVER :lol:

Perth is on my list for next winter. 8)

Phil what part of NZ are you in?

I live in the Rodney District, West of Auckland, near Muriwai Beach.
38 miles of sand & some nice dunes to ride on there!

See the attached pics.

Why do you want to go to Aussie?
(Perth is nice as a city, but it aint got the kind of scenery we have here)

I have travelled all over NZ, through all the major centres of Auzzie, Indonesia, Fiji, Tonga, Mainland USA.
We have an awesome little country here, nowhere else compares with the range of scenery we have here, the clean air, water, etc.

Heres a pic from the back door of the Dairy factory I'm currently installing a palletising system in.
 

[attachment deleted by admin]
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Bert on August 13, 2008, 01:43:58 PM
dragonz

Both of those pics are awesome  :thumbs:

Have you ever rode any mountains? 
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:02:46 PM
Going BACK to australia. My wifes brother lives in Melbourne. we were out there in May/June for 2 weeks visiting, but I didn't get to make it around as my flight to Cairnes got canceled  :mad:

I want to go to perth for the Surfing/Beaches. Cairnes for the reef, and Then head over to NZ for a bit.


some pics - http://www.raptorsource.com/forum/index.php?topic=559.0
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 13, 2008, 02:06:07 PM
I havent ridden in the mountains in this pic, but plenty of my friends down this way do.
The ground is very stony, lots of round stones & pebbles, tough on gear (& riders when they fall off)

Have had some awesome rides in the forestry in the North near where I live (some big hills hidden in them trees), & the beach of course.

I also have road bikes (Suzi TL1000S currently) & have had some brilliant rides through the mountain routes in the north, but hanging out to bring the bike to the south & ride down here




Are you a "Real biker"

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A biker went to a bar and ordered a drink. As he sat sipping his whiskey, a young lady sat down next to him. She turned to the biker and asked, "Are you a real biker?" He replied, "Well, I've spent my whole life on Harleys. My momma was pregnant with me when she rode on the back of my Daddy's Harley, then as a little boy I rode on the back with my Daddy until I finally got my own Harley. I've been riding a Harley ever since. So yes, I guess I am a real biker."

She said, "I'm a lesbian. I spend my whole day thinking about women. As soon as I get up in the morning, I think about women; when I shower, watch TV, eat, whatever, everything seems to make me think of women." Then she got up and left.

The biker was thinking about what just happened when a man sat down next to the biker and asked, "Are you a real biker?"

He replied, "I always thought I was, but I just found out I'm a lesbian."
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 02:30:34 PM
haha dragonz-good one! :lol:

nice pics as well. I would love to visit NZ in the near future. :thumbs: When kids are older maybe.
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 13, 2008, 02:36:24 PM
What you ride is how you FERK!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr Ducati -loves himself and is rough and annoying - will spend the whole time watching himself in the mirror
Mr Honda - plain and boring but reliable - missionary only
Mr Yamaha - Wannabe Rossi but really a 2 pump chump
Mr Kawasaki - Believes he was once awesome in bed but now has doubts
Mr Hyosung – Gay
Mr Vespa/scooter - Metro sexual
Mr Buell - Strong but embarrassed - probably a good root but will try and jam it in your arse
Mr Harley-Loves prison sex
Mr KTM - Loose, wild and hang the FERK on - well for 30 seconds at least cause he'll crash and burn
Mr MV Augusta - likes strange and contorted positions
Mr Triumph - premature ejaculator
Mr Moto Guzzi - will root you in a sideways motion - kinda works but just annoying
Mr Bimota - greasy, ugly and a last resort - you'll have to burn the sheets afterwards too
Mr BMW - needs viagra
Mr Suzuki - absolute sex GERD and not for the faint hearted...
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 02:51:40 PM
"Mr Yamaha - Wannabe Rossi but really a 2 pump chump"

sure picked a bad place to post that one. :lol:

and WTF!....

"Mr Suzuki - absolute sex GERD and not for the faint hearted..."

:ban: :rofl:


Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:56:18 PM
It's okay Peels. He doesn't know any better. :lol:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 03:08:16 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:56:18 PM
It's okay Peels. He doesn't know any better. :lol:

backwards-a$$ hemisphere! go flush the toilet and tell me which way it spins :rofl: j/k
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:09:46 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:08:16 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:56:18 PM
It's okay Peels. He doesn't know any better. :lol:

backwards-a$$ hemisphere! go flush the toilet and tell me which way it spins :rofl: j/k

The only reason you know is becuase the cops keep flushing your "stash" Peels.

:moon:

Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 03:12:24 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:09:46 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:08:16 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:56:18 PM
It's okay Peels. He doesn't know any better. :lol:

backwards-a$$ hemisphere! go flush the toilet and tell me which way it spins :rofl: j/k

The only reason you know is becuase the cops keep flushing your "stash" Peels.

:moon:



:(  did I make you angry Colorado. Do you live in Boulder and drive a subaru? :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 03:16:51 PM
He's a san fran wanna be. Drivin the prius w/ the rainbo sticker on the back. :fruity:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:18:24 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:12:24 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:09:46 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:08:16 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:56:18 PM
It's okay Peels. He doesn't know any better. :lol:

backwards-a$$ hemisphere! go flush the toilet and tell me which way it spins :rofl: j/k

The only reason you know is becuase the cops keep flushing your "stash" Peels.

:moon:



:(  did I make you angry Colorado. Do you live in Boulder and drive a subaru? :rofl:

Hell no!!

I'm a hippie-aphobic, I make sure to pollute extra so know gets confused  :lol:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 03:23:12 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:18:24 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:12:24 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:09:46 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:08:16 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:56:18 PM
It's okay Peels. He doesn't know any better. :lol:

backwards-a$$ hemisphere! go flush the toilet and tell me which way it spins :rofl: j/k

The only reason you know is becuase the cops keep flushing your "stash" Peels.

:moon:



:(  did I make you angry Colorado. Do you live in Boulder and drive a subaru? :rofl:

Hell no!!

I'm a hippie-aphobic, I make sure to pollute extra so know gets confused  :lol:

dumping random chemicals in the rivers, never airing up your tires, make sure your truck runs really rich and short a cylinder. Then we know your political alignment. :rofl: j/k don't wanna start that argument. :help:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:24:38 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:23:12 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:18:24 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:12:24 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:09:46 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:08:16 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 13, 2008, 02:56:18 PM
It's okay Peels. He doesn't know any better. :lol:

backwards-a$$ hemisphere! go flush the toilet and tell me which way it spins :rofl: j/k

The only reason you know is becuase the cops keep flushing your "stash" Peels.

:moon:



:(  did I make you angry Colorado. Do you live in Boulder and drive a subaru? :rofl:

Hell no!!

I'm a hippie-aphobic, I make sure to pollute extra so know gets confused  :lol:

dumping random chemicals in the rivers, never airing up your tires, make sure your truck runs really rich and short a cylinder. Then we know your political alignment. :rofl: j/k don't wanna start that argument. :help:

and I use non-recycled toilet paper..........the Horror  :lol:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 03:28:00 PM
film at eleven!
at least you wipe your a$$, I guess.  :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: NaturalRaptor on August 13, 2008, 03:28:19 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 13, 2008, 02:36:24 PM
What you ride is how you F :mad: ck!!

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mr Ducati -loves himself and is rough and annoying - will spend the whole time watching himself in the mirror
Mr Honda - plain and boring but reliable - missionary only
Mr Yamaha - Wannabe Rossi but really a 2 pump chump
Mr Kawasaki - Believes he was once awesome in bed but now has doubts
Mr Hyosung – Gay
Mr Vespa/scooter - Metro sexual
Mr Buell - Strong but embarrassed - probably a good root but will try and jam it in your arse
Mr Harley-Loves prison sex
Mr KTM - Loose, wild and hang the F :mad: ck on - well for 30 seconds at least cause he'll crash and burn
Mr MV Augusta - likes strange and contorted positions
Mr Triumph - premature ejaculator
Mr Moto Guzzi - will root you in a sideways motion - kinda works but just annoying
Mr Bimota - greasy, ugly and a last resort - you'll have to burn the sheets afterwards too
Mr BMW - needs viagra
Mr Suzuki - absolute sex GERD and not for the faint hearted...

The Harley line maybe true around here with all of the Banditos that stir stuff up!  :grin_nod:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:31:38 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:28:00 PM
film at eleven!
at least you wipe your a$$, I guess.  :rofl:


with "Free Tibet" stickers  :grin_nod:

JK


Aaron
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 13, 2008, 03:37:18 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 13, 2008, 03:31:38 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 03:28:00 PM
film at eleven!
at least you wipe your a$$, I guess.  :rofl:


with "Free Tibet" stickers  :grin_nod:

JK


Aaron


ba dum-crish!  :rofl: Im cryin' over here.
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 01:20:43 AM
 
Quote from: Peels660 on August 13, 2008, 02:51:40 PM
"Mr Yamaha - Wannabe Rossi but really a 2 pump chump"

sure picked a bad place to post that one. :lol:

and WTF!....

"Mr Suzuki - absolute sex GERD and not for the faint hearted..."

:ban: :rofl:





Figured I'd prod a few ribs with that one!!
This pertains to road-bikes of course (I have a Suzi TL1000S), but in the case of Quads it is different for sure!
660 Riders are gods hung like horses, men fear them, & women revere them! 8)

700 riders need an injection to keep up!! :rofl:

& when I flush the toilet ithe water goes down not round & round!
We got hippies like you too
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 14, 2008, 06:23:42 AM
 :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Colorado700R on August 14, 2008, 09:38:00 AM
Peels playing "Myth Buster"



[attachment deleted by admin]
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 14, 2008, 10:53:19 AM
Quote from: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 01:20:43 AM
Figured I'd prod a few ribs with that one!!
This pertains to road-bikes of course (I have a Suzi TL1000S), but in the case of Quads it is different for sure!
660 Riders are gods hung like horses, men fear them, & women revere them! 8)

700 riders need an injection to keep up!! :rofl:

& when I flush the toilet ithe water goes down not round & round!
We got hippies like you too

Whoa Whoa Whoa...... Settle down here....


I believe you got those 2 backwards sir..
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 11:43:50 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 14, 2008, 10:53:19 AM
Quote from: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 01:20:43 AM
Figured I'd prod a few ribs with that one!!
This pertains to road-bikes of course (I have a Suzi TL1000S), but in the case of Quads it is different for sure!
660 Riders are gods hung like horses, men fear them, & women revere them! 8)

700 riders need an injection to keep up!! :rofl:

& when I flush the toilet ithe water goes down not round & round!
We got hippies like you too

Whoa Whoa Whoa...... Settle down here....


I believe you got those 2 backwards sir..

Bring it!!
If you bring your 700 to my beach & whip my ass, I'll shout the beers & acknowledge your bikes superiority with pleasure!
Just love winding you yanks up :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 15, 2008, 12:24:45 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 11:43:50 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 14, 2008, 10:53:19 AM
Quote from: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 01:20:43 AM
Figured I'd prod a few ribs with that one!!
This pertains to road-bikes of course (I have a Suzi TL1000S), but in the case of Quads it is different for sure!
660 Riders are gods hung like horses, men fear them, & women revere them! 8)

700 riders need an injection to keep up!! :rofl:

& when I flush the toilet ithe water goes down not round & round!
We got hippies like you too

Whoa Whoa Whoa...... Settle down here....


I believe you got those 2 backwards sir..

Bring it!!
If you bring your 700 to my beach & whip my ass, I'll shout the beers & acknowledge your bikes superiority with pleasure!
Just love winding you yanks up :rofl:

Deal. 8)

But you have to cover shipping for the quad.  ;)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 01:12:06 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 15, 2008, 12:24:45 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 11:43:50 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 14, 2008, 10:53:19 AM
Quote from: dragonz on August 14, 2008, 01:20:43 AM
Figured I'd prod a few ribs with that one!!
This pertains to road-bikes of course (I have a Suzi TL1000S), but in the case of Quads it is different for sure!
660 Riders are gods hung like horses, men fear them, & women revere them! 8)

700 riders need an injection to keep up!! :rofl:

& when I flush the toilet ithe water goes down not round & round!
We got hippies like you too

Whoa Whoa Whoa...... Settle down here....


I believe you got those 2 backwards sir..

Bring it!!
If you bring your 700 to my beach & whip my ass, I'll shout the beers & acknowledge your bikes superiority with pleasure!
Just love winding you yanks up :rofl:

Deal. 8)

But you have to cover shipping for the quad.  ;)
Sorry that wasn't part of my offer, but I could certainly offer accommodation, & some pretty decent tourism suggestions (both bike & non-bike related) for the rest of your stay.
I have travelled most of NZ at one time or other, & can certainly reccommend this country as a "must-do" place to visit.
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 15, 2008, 01:22:05 PM
I agree. While I was in Australia. My wifes sister made it to NZ. She did Glacier Hiking and Bungee Jumping.. And a few other things, I'm not sure what parts of NZ she was in, but nothing but beautiful pics. 8)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 01:49:48 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 15, 2008, 01:22:05 PM
I agree. While I was in Australia. My wifes sister made it to NZ. She did Glacier Hiking and Bungee Jumping.. And a few other things, I'm not sure what parts of NZ she was in, but nothing but beautiful pics. 8)

She would have Bungee Jumped in Queenstown, & the glacier hiking would have been on the west coast, either Fox or Franz Joseph.
Went to Fox 2 weeks ago for a drive (have been working on a project down this way)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 01:51:55 PM
Little Johnny watched the science teacher

start the experiment with the worms.

Four worms were placed into four separate jars.



The first worm was put into a jar of alcohol.

The second worm was put into a jar of cigarette smoke.

The third worm was put into a jar of sperm.

The fourth worm was put into a jar of soil.


After one day, these were the results:

The first worm in alcohol - dead.

The second worm in cigarette smoke - dead.

The third worm in sperm - dead.

The fourth worm in soil - alive.



So the Science teacher asked the class -

"What can you learn from this experiment?"



Little Johnny quickly raised his hand and said,

"As long as you drink, smoke and have sex,

you won't have worms!
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 02:03:24 PM
I gotta split, work awaits

Later Ho's
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 15, 2008, 02:09:28 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 02:03:24 PM
I gotta split, work awaits

Later Ho's

Later Phil!




LOL to the last joke! :lol:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Flynbyu on August 15, 2008, 02:17:18 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 02:03:24 PM
I gotta split, work awaits

Later Ho's

Be careful out there.

~Brian
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 08:11:38 PM
I am stuck!
The mountain passes back to Christchurch to the airport are all closed!

Wanted to get home today, but I can't!
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 15, 2008, 09:28:36 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 08:11:38 PM
I am stuck!
The mountain passes back to Christchurch to the airport are all closed!

Wanted to get home today, but I can't!

from NZ...You like rugby?  NZ is the the all blacks, right?. But...some of them look pretty white. :rofl:     Makes american football look like a sock-hop.
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Bert on August 16, 2008, 12:33:55 AM
Quote from: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 08:11:38 PM
I am stuck!
The mountain passes back to Christchurch to the airport are all closed!

Wanted to get home today, but I can't!
Blizzard?
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 16, 2008, 12:53:44 AM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 15, 2008, 09:28:36 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 15, 2008, 08:11:38 PM
I am stuck!
The mountain passes back to Christchurch to the airport are all closed!

Wanted to get home today, but I can't!

from NZ...You like rugby?  NZ is the the all blacks, right?. But...some of them look pretty white. :rofl:     Makes american football look like a sock-hop.
It's all about the BLACK Jersey!
Big game tonight against the South African Springboks.

An awesome game, I've had too many injuries to play any more (& I'm getting old & fat) but brilliant to watch.

Have you ever seen the Haka they do before each Game?
Totally awesome!
There are 2 different ones they do, dependant on the opposition etc, but both are brilliant
Ka Mate isthe traditional one, & they have a new one Kapo O Pango.
Give ya chills down your spine to watch!

http://www.allblacks.com

is the official website
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 16, 2008, 12:50:58 PM
I was just watching this morning. Gettin a free sports channel today, I guess. It was 5-0 NZ when we had to go out. Brutal sport. I hear ya on the too much older and fatter to play. :(
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: SandDragon on August 16, 2008, 04:36:14 PM
I would like to add... REDONKULOUS.  This is something someone says/does that is so rediculous, it makes them look like such an ass that the whole situation is REDONKULOUS!!!  LOL :P

Praire dogging is also a phrase to refer to when a poopy is real close to happening.  ;)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 17, 2008, 09:24:34 AM
The Haka is awesome. My wifes bro got to see them play and taped the haka. i'll see if I can find it, pretty sweet and VERY intimidating. 8)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Headrope on August 17, 2008, 04:33:53 PM
Quote from: dragonz on August 12, 2008, 11:35:06 PM
Semi random whore type thing................

Best Bridal Gown ever!!


Motorboat ... motorboat....motorboat

[attachment deleted by admin]
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 17, 2008, 05:39:15 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 14, 2008, 09:38:00 AM
Peels playing "Myth Buster"



hey! didn't see this one the other day. prepare for virtual war! :rofl:  a$$

seriously, that's a funny pic though. :lol:

Colorado700 Warning sign:

(http://i333.photobucket.com/albums/m384/mmatop10rankingscom/sheep.gif)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 17, 2008, 06:16:59 PM
For those of you that like to fly........................

After every flight, pilots fill out a form called a gripe sheet, which conveys to the mechanics any problem they had with the airplane during the flight.

The mechanics read and correct the problem, and then explain in writing on the lower half of the form what remedial action was taken.

The pilot reviews the gripe sheets before the next flight.

Never let it be said that ground crews and engineers lack a sense of humor.

Here are some 'actual' maintenance problems submitted by Qantas pilots and the solutions recorded by maintenance engineers.


(P = The problem logged by the pilot)
(S = The solution and action taken by the engineer)


P: Left inside main tire almost needs replacement.
S: Almost replaced left inside main tire.

P: Test flight OK, except auto-land very rough.
S: Auto-land not installed on this aircraft.

P: Something loose in cockpit.
S: Something tightened in cockpit.

P: Dead bugs on windshield.
S: Live bugs on back-order.

P: Autopilot in altitude-hold mode produces a 200
feet-per-minute descent.
S: Cannot reproduce problem on ground.

P: Evidence of leak on right main landing gear.
S: Evidence removed.

P: DME volume unbelievably loud.
S: DME volume set to more believable level.

P: Friction locks cause throttle levers to stick.
S: That's what they're there for.

P: IFF inoperative.
S: IFF always inoperative in OFF mode.

P: Suspected crack in windshield.
S: Suspect you're right.

P: Number 3 engine missing.
S: Engine found on right wing after brief search.

P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be
serious.

P: Target radar hums.
S: Reprogrammed target radar with lyrics.

P: Mouse in cockpit.
S: Cat installed.

P: Noise coming from under instrument panel. Sounds
like a midget pounding on something with a hammer.
S: Took hammer away from midget
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: darkside94 on August 17, 2008, 06:25:18 PM
haha lmao thats original
id love to be the ground crew
id be a total ass to them too
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: kyledvor61 on August 17, 2008, 07:08:06 PM
buddha put down the damn hammer
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 18, 2008, 07:20:41 AM
Quote from: kyledvor61 on August 17, 2008, 07:08:06 PM
buddha put down the damn hammer


huh? ???
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: BRAD on August 18, 2008, 07:44:46 AM
P: Aircraft handles funny.
S: Aircraft warned to straighten up, fly right, and be
serious.

i think thats the funniest one there :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: darkside94 on August 18, 2008, 08:39:16 AM
Quote from: kyledvor61 on August 17, 2008, 07:08:06 PM
I'll put down the damn hammer
thank you kyle that shit was gettin annoying
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 19, 2008, 06:20:20 PM
 Q. What is the difference between a drug dealer and a hooker?
A. A hooker can wash her crack and sell it again.

Q. What's a mixed feeling?
A. When you see your mother-in-law backing off a cliff in your new car.

Q. What's the height of conceit?
A. Having an orgasm and calling out your own name.

Q. What's the definition of macho?
A. Jogging home from your vasectomy.

Q. What's the difference between a G-spot and a golf ball?
A. A guy will actually search for a golf ball

Q. Do you know how New Zealanders practice safe sex?
A. They spray paint X's on the back of the sheep that kick!

Q.Why is divorce so expensive?
A. Because it's worth it!

Q. What is a Yankee?
A. The same as a quickie, but a guy can do it alone.

Q. What do Tupperware and a walrus have in common?
A. They both like a tight seal.

Q. What do a Christmas tree and priest have in common?
A. Their balls are just for decoration.

Q.What is the difference between "ooooooh"and " aaaaaaah"?
A. About three inches.

Q. Why do gay men wear ribbed condoms?
A. For traction in the mud.

Q: What's the difference between purple and pink?
A. The grip.

Q. How do you find a blind man in a nudist colony?
A. It's not hard.

Q: How do you circumcise a hillbilly?
A: Kick his sister in the jaw.

Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife?
A: 45 pounds.

Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband?
A: 45 minutes.

Q: Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact?
A: Breasts don't have eyes.

Q: If the dove is the bird of peace, what is the bird of true love?
A. The swallow.

Q: What is the difference between medium and rare?
A: Six inches is medium, eight inches is rare.

Q. Why do women rub their eyes when they get up in the morning?
A. They don't have balls to scratch!
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Colorado700R on August 19, 2008, 07:53:41 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 17, 2008, 05:39:15 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 14, 2008, 09:38:00 AM
Peels playing "Myth Buster"



hey! didn't see this one the other day. prepare for virtual war! :rofl:  a$$

seriously, that's a funny pic though. :lol:

Colorado700 Warning sign:

(http://i333.photobucket.com/albums/m384/mmatop10rankingscom/sheep.gif)

Iowa warning sign

(http://i233.photobucket.com/albums/ee186/dispenserpez/loid.jpg)
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: kyledvor61 on August 19, 2008, 07:59:59 PM
 :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl: :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Sand84 on August 19, 2008, 08:04:52 PM
Quote from: SandDragon on August 16, 2008, 04:36:14 PM
I would like to add... REDONKULOUS.  This is something someone says/does that is so rediculous, it makes them look like such an ass that the whole situation is REDONKULOUS!!!  LOL :P

Praire dogging is also a phrase to refer to when a poopy is real close to happening.  ;)

Like Wicked REDONKULOUS Tricks :lol:    THRILLBILLIES is a KICK ASS movie :grin_nod:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: kyledvor61 on August 19, 2008, 08:12:17 PM
Quote from: Krandall on August 18, 2008, 07:20:41 AM
Quote from: kyledvor61 on August 17, 2008, 07:08:06 PM
buddha put down the damn hammer


huh? ???


midget with hammer in cockpit.
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Peelz on August 19, 2008, 08:21:32 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 19, 2008, 07:53:41 PM
Quote from: Peels660 on August 17, 2008, 05:39:15 PM
Quote from: Colorado700R on August 14, 2008, 09:38:00 AM
Peels playing "Myth Buster"



hey! didn't see this one the other day. prepare for virtual war! :rofl:  a$$

seriously, that's a funny pic though. :lol:

Colorado700 Warning sign:

(http://i333.photobucket.com/albums/m384/mmatop10rankingscom/sheep.gif)

Iowa warning sign

(http://i233.photobucket.com/albums/ee186/dispenserpez/loid.jpg)


now thats funny!  Try my diet plan...all you have to do is meth, stop eating, and sleeping.  :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: dragonz on August 21, 2008, 03:46:52 AM
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital, wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose.

A young, student nurse appears to give him a partial sponge bath.
"Nurse", he mumbles, from behind the mask. "Are my testicles black?"

Embarrassed, the young nurse replies, "I don't know, Sir. I'm only here
to wash your upper body and feet." He struggles to ask again,
"Nurse, please check. Are my testicles black?"

Concerned that he may elevate his blood pressure and heart rate from
worry about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment and pulls
back the covers. She raises his gown, holds his manhood in one hand
and his testicles in the other.

Then, she takes a close look and says, There's nothing wrong with them,
Sir!"

The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and says very
slowly,
"Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but, listen very, very
closely......

A r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k ?
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: Krandall on August 21, 2008, 08:39:19 AM
 :rofl: :rofl:

That's awesome! :lol:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: BRAD on August 21, 2008, 09:28:44 AM
thats great :rofl:
Title: Re: New Words for 2008
Post by: kyledvor61 on August 21, 2008, 02:41:00 PM
 :rofl: :rofl: