Post some good jokes here!!!!

[Krandall]

Anyone follow Rugby at all??

A little girl was sitting in her classroom in Australia when her teacher walked in and started talking about how proud she is to be an Australian, and how wonderful it is to be a Wallaby supporter. The teacher then asked everyone who supported the Wallabies to put up their hand. Every hand in the class besides one went up. This surprised the teacher and so she asked the little girl why her hand wasn't up.


"Well," said the little girl, "because I don't support the Wallabies." Even more surprised, the teacher asked her who she supported. "I support the All Blacks", she replied. Now a bit irritated, the teacher asked the little girl why she supported the All Blacks. "My mom supports the All Blacks, and my dad supports the All Blacks, so I support the All Blacks." The teacher looked at the little girl and with a smirk asked: "Well, if your mom was an idiot and your dad was an idiot, what would you be?"


The little girl looked up at her teacher, smiled and replied: "A Wallaby supporter!"

That's awesome! 


I was hoping we'd get to catch a Wallabies game while in Australia. But we didnt. I did get to watch an AFL game though. Watched the Collingwood Magpies play. AFL is awesome!

[kyledvor61]

 

[Peelz]

Anyone follow Rugby at all??

A little girl was sitting in her classroom in Australia when her teacher walked in and started talking about how proud she is to be an Australian, and how wonderful it is to be a Wallaby supporter. The teacher then asked everyone who supported the Wallabies to put up their hand. Every hand in the class besides one went up. This surprised the teacher and so she asked the little girl why her hand wasn't up.


"Well," said the little girl, "because I don't support the Wallabies." Even more surprised, the teacher asked her who she supported. "I support the All Blacks", she replied. Now a bit irritated, the teacher asked the little girl why she supported the All Blacks. "My mom supports the All Blacks, and my dad supports the All Blacks, so I support the All Blacks." The teacher looked at the little girl and with a smirk asked: "Well, if your mom was an idiot and your dad was an idiot, what would you be?"


The little girl looked up at her teacher, smiled and replied: "A Wallaby supporter!"

very nice

heard this same one but as bears and packers.

[shookie]

A man is standing in line waiting to enter the theater. All of a sudden he feels someone massaging his back. He turns around and says to the man behind him, "What do you think you're doing?"
The man apologizes and explains he is a chiropractor and explains, "When I noticed how tense the muscles were in your back, I couldn't help myself and just did what I do normally."

The guy in front of him says, "That's no excuse, I'm a lawyer...do you see me screwing the guy in front of me?"

[shookie]

A Blonde goes to Bed Bath & Beyond to buy curtains.
She tells the clerk, 'I would like to buy a pair of pink curtains.

'The clerk assures her that they have a large selection of pink curtains.
She shows her several patterns but the blonde seems to be having a hard time choosing.

Finally she selects a lovely pink floral print.

The clerk then asks what size curtains she needs.

The blonde promptly replies, 'Seventeen inches.'

'Seventeen inches?' asked the clerk. 'That sounds very small. What room are they for?'

The blonde says, 'They aren't for a room. They are for my new computer monitor.

'The surprised clerk replies, 'But Miss, computers do not need curtains!'


The blonde says, 'Hellllooooooooo ... the sales guy said I've got Windoooooows.......

[Peelz]

  haha good one shook...











but you stil f$%k sheep!

[shookie]

That was only once

[Peelz]

That was only once

[Danny T]

That one made me cry

A woman takes a lover home during the day while her husband is
at work.



Her 9-year old son comes home unexpectedly, sees them and hides
in the bedroom closet to watch.



The woman's husband also comes home.





She puts her lover in the
closet, not realizing that the little boy is in there already.






The little boy says, 'Dark in here.






The man says, 'Yes, it is.




'


Boy: 'I have a baseball.



'


Man: 'That's nice'


Boy: 'Want to buy it?'


Man: 'No, thanks.





Boy: 'My Dad's outside.


'


Man: 'OK, how much?'


Boy: '$250'


In the next few weeks, it happens again that the boy and the
lover are in the closet together.





Boy: 'Dark in here.



'


Man: 'Yes, it is.





Boy: 'I have a baseball glove.



'


The lover, remembering the last time, asks the boy, 'How much?'


Boy: '$750'


Man: 'Sold.


'

A few days later, the Dad says to the boy, 'Grab your glove,
let's go outside and have a game of catch h.



'

The boy says, 'I can't, I sold my baseball and my glove.


'

The Dad asks, 'How much did you sell them for?'

Boy: '$1,000'

The Dad says, 'That's terrible to over charge your friends like
that...that is way more than those two things cost.



I'm taking you to
church, to confession.


'

They go to the church and the Dad makes the little boy sit in
the confessional booth and closes the door.



The boy says, 'Dark in here.





The priest says, 'Don't start that shit again; you're in my
closet now.

[kyledvor61]

 

[Peelz]

  good one dmx

[AJ RAPTOR]

A man was speeding down the highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over.

The officer handed the man a citation, and then as he turned to walk back to his cruiser, the man asked, "Officer, I know I was speeding, but I don't think it's fair. There were plenty of other cars around me going just as fast, so why did I get the ticket?"

"Ever go fishing?" the policeman asked the man.

"Um, yeah... so," the startled man replied.

The officer grinned and added, "Ever catch ALL the fish?"

[AJ RAPTOR]

Two gas company servicemen, a senior training supervisor, and a young trainee, were out checking meters in a suburban neighbourhood. They parked their truck at the end of the alley and worked their way to the other end. At the last house, a woman watched the two men from her kitchen window as they checked her gas meter.

When they had finished the meter check, the senior supervisor challenged his younger co-worker to a foot race back to the truck to prove that an older guy could outrun a younger one. The co-worker accepted the challenge. As they approached the truck in full stride, the two men realized that the lady from the kitchen window was huffing and puffing right behind them. They stopped in their tracks and asked the woman why she was running behind them.

Gasping for breath, she replied, "I'm not stupid... when I see two gas men running that fast, I figure I'd better run too!"

[darkside94]

haha that pretty good

[AJ RAPTOR]

Age Bell Curve

It seems that life goes by resembling somewhat of a bell curve of what is considered successful...

At age 4...success is...not peeing in your pants.

At age 10...success is...making your own meals.

At age 12...success is...having friends.

At age 16...success is...having a drivers license.

At age 20...success is...having sex.

At age 35...success is...having money.

At age 50...success is...having money.

At age 60...success is...having sex.

At age 70...success is...having a drivers license.

At age 75...success is...having friends.

At age 80...success is...making your own meals.

At age 85...success is...not peeing in your pants.