Troubled Kid(need advice)

[Krandall]

well. You can't expect a full change in the course of two weeks.

[Peelz]

well. You can't expect a full change in the course of two weeks.

nope, didnt.

Iv'e asked the Head of coaching to come watch a match, and give me advice. Because I tend to be mr passive aggressive, aka wishy washy lol. and just let things go, just living with problems. Fine most of the time... but bad others.       just who i am.

[Hefe]

Peels.... wishy washy? no... really??

and who holds an important game on a such a huge family vacation weekend? (or is that just a Michigan thing?)

[Peelz]

Peels.... wishy washy? no... really??

and who holds an important game on a such a huge family vacation weekend? (or is that just a Michigan thing?)

first, a quick reminder, about who rode 500+ miles to see who. 

secondly. agree. but not all that big here I guess. Hanging out on Monday with some fam. shooting bang bangs..

[Hefe]

lets talk more about the bang bangs!

[Peelz]

lets talk more about the bang bangs!

we got dumped on this weekend. soccer fields were soup. went to the fam thing, more rain. no click bangs.   

kid did OK though. no meltdowns! 

[Peelz]

related news:

I am doubling down on this damned sport.... with Wifey's blessing. the old recreational league I would normally coach, one of the moms messaged me. Nobody stepped up to volunteer. So she did, has NO clue about the sport and asked for help. It's all Colin's old buddies. So we are going to ALSO help with their practice, and I'm going to unleash him on their league. We went and watched them, we were already out there because Colin got to do his first paid job, of refereeing the little under-8 rec-league kids (adorable) And well... his team, they need help. Terrible.

so, 4 days in Town now, plus weekends gone. the only one I have off, we're doing the Ozarks.

Anyhoo, Guess its a sign of getting old maybe...but, as stressful as all of this is, on me, and sometimes my marriage (basically, finding time to focus on it and still getting ME time) I tell ya, putting energy into something like this that future generations will benefit from has a calming effect on me. Plus, it feels a bit like my dad is still around....doubly calming.



Fall coming, its gorgeous out finally...summer was brutal. need to get back into shape again. I fell off the wagon, HARD. 

[Hefe]

need to get back into shape again. I fell off the wagon, HARD. 

me too!!!

[Peelz]

need to get back into shape again. I fell off the wagon, HARD. 

me too!!!

alright old man! lets do this. 

but srs. 

[Peelz]

Little update to the story. we had a team pumpkin carving party for the kids... Good time...had a chance to catch up with this kids "mom" the guidance counselor. SUPER nice OLD lady.

I Asked her if he was still enjoying playing, or dreading it... being that hes quite aways behind. He still struggles sometimes... normal banter vs mocking the other kids.... I told her hes doing "okay" just a few issues....  He lied to me about playing the sport for a long time "yeah he does that" yeah I probably would too.

She proceeded to tell me his whole story, and let me just say.... people suck! Its More than just "mom died, dads in jail..."

starts with "from where he started, you'd be amazed, he was like a puppy, literally, including the housebreaking - I should probably have met with you before enrolling him"

mom, drug addict now deceased, had custody. Apparently, left him alone hours on end... AND, she OD'd while he was in the house. day and a half. when he was 3.

Didn't learn to speak till he was 3 1/2... guess he would just pi$$ and $hit all over the house....

moms gone, Dad gets custody. Goes nuts. Fires handgun all over the house, knocks out some windows, then points it at himself, with son and other folks in the room.  Gun jams.... Dad goes to jail. gets out, has new girlfriend from canada, who steals his money, then they start robbing houses and are on the lam I guess. she tells me, pretty sure they're going to have to raise him, Dad isnt going to show up for the hearings... their kids are in their 30's.... the reason they do, he had gone to 12 different fosters. and that's not helping anybody.....

f**k me, guys. I feel like $hit dad when I forget to feed my kids something healthy because I'M in a hurry.   

IF all this kid ends up with is is a problem of  playing the victim, consider him lucky.

[Krandall]

WOW. I don't even know what to say. It's legitimately sad to see kids not even get a fighting chance. There's a lot of people in this world who don't deserve to have kids. I don't even know  how to respond to that kid. So, is the guidance counselor planning on fully raising him or just fostering til they can find a legit family? I think it can turn out to be a good happy ending story however, there's a lot of damage done already. It's crazy to see how those first few years can really impact a child's personality. 
I really can't express how bad I feel for the kid. It's not his fault.

[Peelz]

WOW. I don't even know what to say. It's legitimately sad to see kids not even get a fighting chance. There's a lot of people in this world who don't deserve to have kids. I don't even know  how to respond to that kid. So, is the guidance counselor planning on fully raising him or just fostering til they can find a legit family? I think it can turn out to be a good happy ending story however, there's a lot of damage done already. It's crazy to see how those first few years can really impact a child's personality. 
I really can't express how bad I feel for the kid. It's not his fault.

right? so hard.

that's why they have him. They were tired of watching him bounce around from house to house...  and she tells me, that this kid isn't an anomaly. TONS of people cant handle regular care for their kids. gotta be depressing.

Her, and her husband, (the principal) know its going to be bad for him. so they just want to give him a flying chance...so do I.

just terrible. and knowing this. the kid really isn't that bad. Just not maturity level you'd expect. But all kids have problems this age really. My son, i think the hormones are happenin'. He has no patience for lazy kids. or shitty refs lol hes 11. its natural, just funny its happenin all at once. kid tuggin on his jersey pulls him down... he gets up with the "Come at me" look. The kid was like 2 ft tall.  maybe 20lbs.  "quit grabbin on me bro!" ref cautions him, starts to look like he might cry. funny...

[Peelz]

So, indoor soccer season is coming up. I sent out a message to parents with the signup info. this kid, sent email directly to Sara, his caregiver... guardian whatever... hell be in a younger group, so I prob wont coach his team on game days, but, since we combine teams for training, Ill be there to help him out for practice.


Asked her how how he was doing, since haven't seen the boys in a a month or so... Told her to wish him a Merry Christmas for me.. 

she replies...

"Xach is doing really well. But...his dad is losing all his rights as a father to him after all, which is a no-win for anyone. He is handling better than I ever could though, and He seems to have really connected with you, and was very excited to hear indoor is starting, and that you'll be there"



 

[Hefe]

Nice Peels... srs... that's awesome!

not easy to connect with a broken kid... mad props

[Peelz]

Nice Peels... srs... that's awesome!

not easy to connect with a broken kid... mad props

it is. long way to go. But... it'll certainly take time to try and fix the disgusting world this kid's parents created for him.

just makes me sick.