Re: Off Topic Bullsh*t Thread Volume XXI

[Krandall]

Chuck norris can blow bubbles w/ beef jerky

[Flynbyu]

That's freaking hilarious!

So here's a win for homeowners: http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/years/2009/0409092boynton1.html

Oh, and Chuck Norris puts the FUN in Funeral.

~Brian

[Krandall]

That lady was on the Today! show yesterday!!! Freaking awesome! 

[Flynbyu]

Theives piss me off.

~Brian

[Peelz]

Theives piss me off.

~Brian

We gotta get our crack somewhere homie! 

[Krandall]

Just run around w/ a sword going "lalalalalalalalalalala"

scare them tweakers

[Flynbyu]

Today in history...

Apr 15 1792

The Guillotine is first tested on human corpses.

Apr 15 1912

Unsinkable ship Titanic sinks after being torn by iceberg, with a loss of 1493 passengers.

Apr 15 1945

British and Canadian troops liberate the Bergen-Belsen death camp in northern Germany.

Apr 15 1955

The first McDonald's franchise opens in Des Plains, a suburb of Chicago. Because it is the first one launched by Ray Kroc, he names it "McDonald's #1" despite the fact that the McDonald brothers had already opened eight of their chain restaurants before they began accepting licensees. Kroc's unfortunate numbering system guarantees perpetual confusion for amateur fast food historians the world over.

Apr 15 1962

Actress Clara Blandick, 80, the Auntie Em of the Wizard of Oz, takes an overdose of sleeping pills and ties a plastic bag around her head in a Hollywood hotel room. Prior to this, she had prominently arranged her resume and press clippings so the newspapers would get her obituary right.

Apr 15 1989

96 soccer fans are crushed to death at Hillsborough stadium in Sheffield, England. During the opening minutes of the FA Cup semi-final between Liverpool and Nottingham Forest, Sheffield police order a gate opened at one end of the stadium. A throng of 2,000 Liverpool fans attempt to surge into the seating section, smashing more than 250 already-seated fans against the security fence.

Apr 15 1990

Greta Garbo dead.

Apr 15 1990

Mass food poisoning kills 150 people at an engagement party in Basti, Uttar Pradesh. Advice: Don't eat the bread.

Apr 15 1999

Sean "Puffy" Combs is accused of beating Steve Stoute, a record manager from Interscope Records. Stoute refused to remove images of Combs shot for a Nas video (Hate Me Now). Police arrested Combs for aggravated assault.

Apr 15 1999

Dutch airlines KLM issues an apology for shredding 400 ground squirrels at Schipol Airport in Amsterdam. The squirrels did not have proper importation papers, and thus were forced to meet their fate of grinding steel rotary blades. A public outcry forced KLM's apology.

Birthdays today...
1452 – Leonardo da Vinci, Italian Renaissance polymath (d. 1519)
1469 – Guru Nanak Dev, Founder of Sikhism (d. 1539)
1489 – Sinan, Ottoman architect (d. 1588)
1552 – Pietro Cataldi, Italian mathematician (d. 1626)
1588 – Claudius Salmasius, French classical scholar (d. 1653)
1641 – Robert Sibbald, Scottish physician (d. 1722)
1642 – Suleiman II, Ottoman Sultan (d. 1691)
1646 – King Christian V of Denmark (d. 1699)
1646 – Pierre Poiret, French mystic (d. 1719)
1684 – Catherine I of Russia (d. 1727)
1688 – Johann Friedrich Fasch, German composer (d. 1758)
1707 – Leonhard Euler, Swiss mathematician (d. 1783)
1710 – William Cullen, Scottish physician (d. 1790)
1721 – Prince William Augustus, Duke of Cumberland, English military leader (d. 1765)
1741 – Charles Willson Peale, American painter, soldier and naturalist (d. 1827)
1772 – Étienne Geoffroy Saint-Hilaire, French naturalist (d. 1844)
1793 – Friedrich Georg Wilhelm von Struve, German astronomer (d. 1864)
1794 – Jean Pierre Flourens, French physiologist (d. 1867)
1800 – James Clark Ross, English explorer (d. 1862)
1809 – Hermann Grassmann, German mathematician (d. 1877)
1832 – Wilhelm Busch, German poet (d. 1908)
1841 – Joseph E. Seagram, Canadian distillery founder (d. 1919)
1843 – Henry James, American author (d. 1916)
1858 – Émile Durkheim, French sociologist (d. 1917)
1861 – Bliss Carman, Canadian poet (d. 1929)
1874 – George Harrison Shull, American plant geneticist (d. 1954)
1874 – Johannes Stark, German physicist, Nobel laureate (d. 1957)
1875 – James J. Jeffries, American heavyweight boxer (d. 1953)
1878 – Robert Walser, Swiss writer (d. 1956)
1879 – Melville Henry Cane, American lawyer (d. 1980)
1883 – Stanley Bruce, eighth Prime Minister of Australia (d. 1967)
1885 – Tadeusz Kutrzeba, Polish general (d. 1947)
1886 – Nikolay Gumilyov, Russian poet (d. 1921)
1888 – Maximilian Kronberger, German poet (d. 1904)
1889 – Thomas Hart Benton, American muralist (d. 1975)
1889 – A. Philip Randolph, American activist (d. 1979)
1892 – Corrie ten Boom, Dutch author and Holocaust survivor (d. 1983)
1892 – Theo Osterkamp, World War I and World War II German fighter pilot (d. 1975)
1894 – Bessie Smith, American blues singer (d. 1937)
1895 – Clark McConachy, New Zealand billiards player (d. 1980)
1896 – Nikolay Nikolayevich Semyonov, Russian chemist, Nobel laureate (d. 1986)
1901 – Joe Davis, English snooker player (d. 1978)
1902 – Fernando Pessa, Portuguese journalist (d. 2002)
1904 – Arshile Gorky, Armenian Artist (d. 1948)
1907 – Nikolaas Tinbergen, Dutch ethologist, Nobel laureate (d. 1988)
1908 – Eden Ahbez, American songwriter (d. 1995)
1908 – Lita Grey, American actress (d. 1995)
1910 – Miguel Najdorf, Argentine chess grandmaster (d. 1997)
1912 – Kim Il-sung, President of North Korea (d. 1994)
1916 – Alfred S. Bloomingdale, American businessman (d. 1982)
1917 – Hans Conried, American actor (d. 1982)
1917 – James Kee, American politician (d. 1989)
1920 – Thomas Szasz, Hungarian-American psychiatrist
1920 – Richard von Weizsäcker, President of Germany
1921 – Georgi Beregovoi, Russian cosmonaut (d. 1995)
1922 – Michael Ansara, Syrian-American actor
1922 – Harold Washington, American politician (d. 1987)
1924 – Sir Neville Marriner, English conductor
1927 – Robert Mills, American physicist (d. 1999)
1930 – Vigdís Finnbogadóttir, President of Iceland
1933 – Roy Clark, American musician
1933 – David Hamilton, British photographer, film director and producer
1933 – Elizabeth Montgomery, American actress (d. 1995)
1933 – Boris Strugatsky, Russian author
1936 – Raymond Poulidor, French cyclist
1937 – Bob Luman, American country singer (d. 1978)
1938 – Hso Khan Pha, Burmese politician
1939 – Claudia Cardinale, Tunisian-born actress
1939 – Marty Wilde, British singer
1940 – Jeffrey Archer, British author
1940 – Willie Davis, American baseball player
1940 – Woodie Fryman, American baseball player
1940 – Robert Lacroix, French Canadian professor of economics
1940 – Robert Walker Jr., American actor
1941 – Howard Berman, American politician
1942 – Francis X. DiLorenzo, American Catholic prelate
1942 – Walt Hazzard, American basketball player
1942 – Kenneth Lay, American businessman (d. 2006)
1944 – Dzhokhar Dudaev, Chechen leader (d. 1996)
1944 – Dave Edmunds, Welsh musician
1947 – Lois Chiles, American actress
1947 – Cristina Husmark Pehrsson, Swedish politician
1947 – Mike Chapman, British songwriter
1947 – Linda Bloodworth-Thomason, American writer and television producer
1948 – Michael Kamen, American composer (d. 2003)
1949 – Tonio K, American singer
1949 – Alla Pugacheva, Russian singer
1949 – Craig Zadan, American film producer
1950 – Josiane Balasko, French actress, director and screenwriter
1950 – Amy Wright, American actress
1951 – Heloise, American newspaper columnist
1952 – Bengt Gingsjö, Swedish swimmer
1952 – Kym Gyngell, Australian comedian
1952 – Sam McMurray, American actor
1954 – Seka, American pornographic actress
1955 – Dodi Al-Fayed, Egyptian businessman (d. 1997)
1956 – Michael Cooper, American basketball player
1957 – Evelyn Ashford, American athlete
1958 – Keith Acton, Canadian ice hockey player and coach
1958 – Dolores Gordon-Smith, British Writer
1958 – Noni Ιoannidou, Greek fashion model and actress
1958 – Benjamin Zephaniah, British writer
1959 – Fruit Chan, Hong Kong film director
1959 – Emma Thompson, English actress
1959 – Thomas F. Wilson, American actor
1959 – Kevin Lowe, Canadian ice hockey player and general manager
1960 – Tony Jones (snooker), English snooker player
1960 – Pedro Delgado, Spanish cyclist
1960 – HRH Prince Philippe, Duke of Brabant, heir to the Belgian throne
1962 – Surjit Bindrakhia, Punjabi Bhangra singer
1962 – Nawal El Moutawakel, Morrocan hurdler
1962 – Tom Kane, American voice actor
1963 – Bobby Pepper, American journalist
1965 – Linda Perry, American musician
1966 – Samantha Fox, English singer
1967 – Frankie Poullain, British musician (The Darkness)
1967 – Dara Torres, American swimmer
1967 – Alt, Brazilian comic creator
1968 – Ed O'Brien, British musician (Radiohead)
1968 – Stacey Williams, American model
1969 – Jeromy Burnitz, American baseball player
1969 – Jimmy Waite, Canadian ice hockey goaltender
1970 – Flex Alexander, American actor
1971 – Katy Hill, British television presenter
1971 – Sarah Jane Hamilton, British pornographic actress
1971 – Jason Sehorn, American football player
1972 – Lou Romano, American voice actor
1972 – Arturo Gatti, Canadian boxer
1974 – Mike Quinn, American football player
1974 – Keith Malley, American comedian and podcaster (Keith and The Girl)
1974 – Danny Pino, American actor
1974 – Douglas Spain, American actor
1975 – Paul Dana, American race car driver (d. 2006)
1976 – Jason Bonsignore, Canadian ice hockey player
1976 – Susan Ward, American actress
1977 – Brian Pothier, American ice hockey player
1978 – Austin Aries, American wrestler
1978 – Milton Bradley, American baseball player
1978 – Tim Corcoran, American baseball player
1980 – Natalie Casey, British actress
1980 – James Foster, English cricketer
1980 – Raúl López, Spanish basketball player
1980 – Victor Núñez, Costa Rican footballer
1980 – Willie Mason, Australian Rugby League Player
1980 – Fränk Schleck, Luxembourgish cyclist
1981 – Andrés D'Alessandro, Argentine football player
1981 – Seth Wulsin, American artist
1982 – Anthony Green, American musician
1982 – Seth Rogen, Canadian actor and writer
1982 – Albert Riera, Spanish footballer
1982 – Michael Aubrey, American baseball player
1983 – Ilya Kovalchuk, Russian ice hockey player
1983 – Alice Braga, Brazilian actress
1983 – Dudu Cearense, Brazilian footballer
1983 – Bronson La'Cassie, Australian professional golfer
1984 – Rodney Carney, NBA athlete
1984 – Cam Janssen, American ice hockey player
1984 – Ben Kasica, Guitarist of rock band Skillet
1985 – John Danks, American baseball player
1985 – Aaron Laffey, American baseball player
1986 – Quincy Owusu-Abeyie, Dutch footballer
1986 – Tom Heaton, English footballer
1990 – Emma Watson, English actress
1991 – Daiki Arioka, Japanese Actor and Singer
1992 – Amy Diamond, Swedish singer
1993 – Madeleine Martin, American television actress

Famous deaths...
1053 – Godwin, Earl of Wessex
1220 – Adolf of Altena, Archbishop of Cologne
1415 – Manuel Chrysoloras, Greek humanist and grammarian
1446 – Filippo Brunelleschi, Italian architect (b. 1377)
1610 – Robert Parsons, English Jesuit priest (b. 1546)
1621 – John Carver, first governor of Plymouth Colony
1632 – George Calvert, Proprietor of the Avalon (Maryland) Colony (b. 1580)
1641 – Domenico Zampieri, Italian painter (b. 1581)
1652 – Patriarch Joseph, head of the Russian Orthodox Church
1659 – Simon Dach, German poet (b. 1605)
1704 – Johann van Waveren Hudde, Dutch mathematician (b. 1628)
1719 – Françoise d'Aubigné, marquise de Maintenon, second wife of Louis XIV of France (b. 1635)
1754 – Jacopo Riccati, Italian mathematician (b. 1676)
1761 – Archibald Campbell, 3rd Duke of Argyll, Scottish politician (b. 1682)
1761 – William Oldys, English antiquarian and bibliographer (b. 1696)
1764 – Madame de Pompadour, mistress of King Louis XV of France (b. 1721)
1764 – Peder Horrebow, Danish astronomer (b. 1679)
1765 – Mikhail Lomonosov, Russian scientist and writer (b. 1711)
1788 – Giuseppe Bonno, Austrian composer (b. 1711)
1793 – Ignacije Szentmartony, Croatian Jesuit missionary and geographer (b. 1718)
1804 – Charles Pichegru, French general (strangled in prison) (b. 1761)
1854 – Arthur Aikin, English chemist, mineralogist, and writer (b. 1773)
1865 – Abraham Lincoln, 16th President of the United States (b. 1809)
1888 – Matthew Arnold, English poet (b. 1822)
1889 – Father Damien, Belgian missionary (b. 1840)
1898 – Kepa Te Rangihiwinui, Maori military leader
1912 – Edward Smith, captain of the RMS Titanic (b. 1850)
1912 – Jack Phillips, British wireless telegraphist. (b. 1887)
1912 – John Jacob Astor IV, billionaire (b. 1864)
1912 – Thomas Andrews (shipbuilder), was an Irish-born businessman and shipbuilder. (b. 1873)
1912 – William T. Stead American author and journalist. (b. 1849)
1927 – Gaston Leroux, French writer (b. 1868)
1938 – César Vallejo, Peruvian poet (b. 1892)
1942 – Robert Musil, Austrian novelist (b. 1880)
1943 – Aristarkh Lentulov, Russian artist (d. 1882)
1945 – Hermann Florstedt, Nazi leader (b. 1895)
1948 – Radola Gajda, Czech military commander and politician (d. 1892)
1949 – Wallace Beery, American actor (b. 1885)
1957 – Pedro Infante, Mexican actor and singer (b. 1917)
1962 – Clara Blandick, American actress (b. 1881)
1962 – Arsenio Lacson, Filipino politician and sportswriter (b. 1911)
1963 – Edward "Carji" Greeves, Australian rules footballer (b. 1903)
1969 – Victoria Eugenie of Battenberg, Queen of Spain (b. 1887)
1970 – Ripper Collins, American baseball player (b. 1904)
1971 – Dan Reeves, American football team owner (b. 1912)
1974 – Giovanni D'Anzi, Italian songwriter (b. 1906)
1975 – Richard Conte, American actor (b. 1910)
1980 – Raymond Bailey, American actor (b. 1904)
1980 – Jean-Paul Sartre, French philosopher and writer, Nobel laureate (b. 1905)
1982 – Arthur Lowe, British actor (b. 1915)
1983 – Corrie ten Boom, Dutch author and Holocaust survivor (b. 1892)
1984 – Tommy Cooper, Welsh comedy magician (b. 1921)
1984 – Alexander Trocchi, Scottish writer (b. 1925)
1986 – Jean Genet, French author (b. 1910)
1988 – Kenneth Williams, English actor and comedian (b. 1926)
1988 – Youri Egorov, Soviet classical pianist (b. 1954)
1989 – Nesuhi Ertegün, American record executive (b. 1917)
1989 – Hu Yaobang, Chinese politician (b. 1915)
1990 – Greta Garbo, Swedish actress (b. 1905)
1992 – Otis Barton, American deep-sea diver, inventor and actor (b. 1899)
1993 – John Tuzo Wilson, Canadian geologist (b. 1908)
1993 – Leslie Charteris, Singapore-born author (b. 1907)
1994 – John Curry, English figure skater (b. 1949)
1995 – Harry Shoulberg, American painter, serigrapher (b. 1903)
1998 – Pol Pot, Cambodian dictator (b. 1925)
1999 – Harvey Postlethwaite, British engineer and racing car designer (b. 1944)
2000 – Edward Gorey, American illustrator (b. 1925)
2001 – Joey Ramone, American musician and singer (The Ramones) (b. 1951)
2002 – Damon Knight, American author (b. 1922)
2002 – Byron "Whizzer" White, American football player and U.S. Supreme Court Justice (b. 1917)
2003 – Erin Fleming, Canadian actress (b. 1941)
2003 – Reg Bundy, British performer (b. 1941)
2004 – Ray Condo, Canadian musician (b. 1950)
2005 – John Fred, American singer (b. 1941)
2007 – Brant Parker, American cartoonist (b. 1920)
2008 – Krister Stendahl, Swedish Lutheran theologian and bishop (b. 1921)
2008 – Benoît Lamy, Belgian movie director (b. 1945)

Holidays and observances...
Ancient Latvia—Tipsa Diena was observed.
Hawai'i – Father Damien Day—celebrated annually.
India – Baisakhi, Pôhela Boishakh, Rongali Bihu
North Korea – Arirang Festival held to commemorate Kim Il-sung's birth.
Roman Empire—the Fordicia was celebrated in honor of Terra.
United States – April 15 is the official deadline for filing an individual tax return (or requesting an extension) in most areas of the country (see Tax Day).

Have a great Wednesday.

~Brian

[Krandall]

Apr 15 1912

Unsinkable ship Titanic sinks after being torn by iceberg, with a loss of 1493 passengers.


ICEBERG DEAD AHEAD!!!!

[Flynbyu]

The have a mock up Titanic museum in Branson, MO. You can stick your finger in the water that is the same temperature as the ocean was that night. I couldn't imagine spending 30 seconds in the water let alone dying in it.

~Brian

[Krandall]

I'll never let go Brian... I'll never let go.

[socalrappy700]

I would throw that fluffy bitch in the water and take the board myself. 

[Krandall]

 

You'd only throw her in the water cuz' you like em cold and stiff.

[Flynbyu]

I'll never let go Brian... I'll never let go.

Rose was a dirty whore, and I would have shagged her rotten.



~Brian

[Flynbyu]

You'd only throw her in the water cuz' you like em cold and stiff.

Post of the Day!

E and his necropheliac tendancies.



~Brian

[Krandall]

I'll never let go Brian... I'll never let go.

Rose was a dirty whore, and I would have shagged her rotten.



~Brian

dang right!