Breaking News Thread

[robkd]

I don't think i like my friends that much anymore...........i was sitting here thinking "what would i do?".........definetely would not be handing it out.  Then again i would probably have found the drugs too, and sold them to peels to make my cash stash grow

[Flynbyu]

Hell yeah!



~Brian

[Flynbyu]

March 14--A Iowa man was arrested yesterday after he was spotted fondling and making out with a pair of blow-up dolls in a supermarket parking lot. Shoppers called cops when they spotted Eric Pealer, getting busy in the front seat of his automobile, which was parked directly in front of a public store. Evidence photos (seen below and here) showing Pealer's inanimate partners were provided to Raptorsource.com by the New London Police Department. According to a police report, witnesses told cops that Pealer was "performing activity to two different blow up dolls in his vehicle that was consistent with masturbation and other simulated sexual activity." He was also spotted "aggressively" kissing the dolls. When confronted by police, Pealer said that he was headed to Target to "get some clothes for his dolls." Pealer, charged with breach of peace, was wearing shorts with a three-inch opening "in the crotch area." Of course, he "had no underwear on under the shorts," noted police.





~Brian

[NaturalRaptor]

Apparently this plastic pervert also like Reese's! 

[Peelz]

Brian...I am shocked and appauled.   



























You'll never catch me in a Lincoln.            

[Oilfield_Mafia]

 

Damnit man!

















A Lincoln!?!?!?!?

Im so disapointed..

[Peelz]

story via tweaktimes.net:

Arkansas State Police Baffled by Overloaded Servers.


Residents in the Ft. Smith Arkansas area awoke this morning, unable to connect to the Web. After countless hours of investigation, the source of the problem was traced to the home of Brian Sheppard, a local Auto Sales Rep. The overload of the servers began when Mr. Sheppard accidentally uploaded pornographic material from his home PC. "we are absolutely astonished by the sheer amount of material" said Lt. Bob Johnson. "We tried to erase all the files, but when they went into the recycle bin, they overloaded that as well"

Police finally arrived at Sheppard's house, to find him half naked, crying in front of his computer. He was so overweight, and, he hadn't moved in days.





Police confronted him, but they got no response, only moderate grunting. Apparently, when his computer became devoid of porn, he was unable to function. This, combined with the failure of the internet to open, caused a stroke, and Mr. Sheppard became incapacitated. They were finally able to get him to move by dangling a danish in front of his face, and promising him a visit from many small asian boys. When asked why he was so upset, and so overweight. Brian replied: "I am just not what I used to be" As he pointed to a picture of him and his lovely ex-wife on the wall behind his desk:




We are happy to report Mr. Sheppard is doing well after a shower and a shave.



The pornographic material, which totaled over 9000 gb of memory, was copied onto it's own server, to be inspected by psych. officials at a local hospital. The internet was back in business as of 5pm local time. No charges were filed as of yet, since this gigantic amount of porn is unprecendented.

[Flynbyu]

Good one!



Bastard.

~Brian

[Krandall]

Boy, 3, speared through torso with 3-foot iron rod, liver injuredArticle
http://www.news.com.au/dailytelegraph/story/0,22049,25192513-5006003,00.html

THREE-YEAR-OLD Mehul Kumar is lucky to be alive after being speared through the torso with a 3-foot (1 metre) iron rod.

The boy, from Jharkand, India, was rushed to the hospital after he impaled himself falling off a terrace and onto a rod last week.

The boy was fully conscious when he arrived at the hospital. Doctors removed the rod during a 4-hour operation and said he had lost a lot of blood and suffered some injuries, but "nothing major."

"Opening the abdomen, we discovered his liver was injured, the stomach was injured, but thankfully, the spleen and pancreas were safe," said surgeon Sandeep Aggarwal said. "The child was lucky that he did not suffer any major injury but yes he had substantial injuries."

Aggarwal praised Mehul for his strong willpower.

Mehul was playing with colours on the terrace when he fell on an iron rod left standing on the under-construction terrace, his uncle Raja Kumar Vishwakarma said. The rod pierced through his body and then broke, resulting in his fall from the roof.

In July last year, Supratim Dutta had similarly been impaled by a 5-foot long (1.5 metre) iron bar that had pierced through his chest in New Delhi. Supratim was saved by the doctors of All India Institute of Medical Sciences.

[Flynbyu]

Wow.

He's a lucky kid!

The nice thing about the liver is if you remove part of it, it can grow back!

~Brian

[P.I.M.P.]

More Utards

Man arrested after attacking woman with deer antlers
March 16th, 2009 @ 4:11pm
By Marc Giauque

WEST VALLEY CITY -- A West Valley man faces felony and other charges for attacking his girlfriend with a set of deer antlers. It happened over the weekend at an apartment complex near 3600 South and 2900 West.

West Valley police Capt. Tom McLachlan says the man beat the victim's face with his fist, breaking her nose, then at some point grabbed a set of deer antlers and hit her in the back of the head. McLachlan says the force of the blow was strong enough to break the antlers.

"I'm not surprised that people use various objects in a domestic violence. I mean, obviously it's a very emotional time, and if they're prone to that, they grab what's at hand," McLachlan said.

The woman suffered lacerations and various other bumps and bruises but was not seriously hurt.

Police responding to the scene discovered the suspect had fled. They used a blood hound to track him to a field not far away.

Christian B. Christensen, 35, was booked into jail on a felony aggravated assault charge and several misdemeanor charges, including committing domestic violence in the presence of a child.


http://www.ksl.com/?nid=148&sid=5871721

[disco]

Now if she was screaming at the cops, "Don't take'em away, I love him" that would indicate they are of the genus niveus purgamentum, most likely from the southern United States.

Please note "take'em" is pronounced "take-EEM".





http://www.tranexp.com:2000/Translate/result.shtml  latin to english translator

[FoundArealQuad]

 

[Krandall]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090317/ap_on_fe_st/odd_dog_act;_ylt=Am6Bgyy0iYrOLLS.FW1bNCftiBIF
La. police arrest growling man on drug charges

MANSFIELD, La. – Authorities arrested a 32-year-old Texas man on drug charges on Thursday after construction workers saw him on his hands and knees, eating mud and growling like a dog. A woman who accompanied the man from Texas told investigators he had been wandering around the complex and eating dog food.

Sheriff's Lt. Horace Womack said a small bottle of PCP, a half-pound of marijuana and one-fourth ounce of crack cocaine were seized during the man's arrest.

The man was booked with possessing all three drugs with intent to distribute them. He was placed in a cell where jailers at the DeSoto Detention Center could keep an eye on him.

[Flynbyu]

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090317/ap_on_fe_st/odd_dog_act;_ylt=Am6Bgyy0iYrOLLS.FW1bNCftiBIF
La. police arrest growling man on drug charges

MANSFIELD, La. – Authorities arrested a 32-year-old Texas man on drug charges on Thursday after construction workers saw him on his hands and knees, eating mud and growling like a dog. A woman who accompanied the man from Texas told investigators he had been wandering around the complex and eating dog food.

Sheriff's Lt. Horace Womack said a small bottle of PCP, a half-pound of marijuana and one-fourth ounce of crack cocaine were seized during the man's arrest.

The man was booked with possessing all three drugs with intent to distribute them. He was placed in a cell where jailers at the DeSoto Detention Center could keep an eye on him.

Nothing like a PCP high.



~Brian