Post some good jokes here!!!!

[Magz]

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one.

Michael J. Fox has a small one.

Madonna doesn't have one.

The Pope has one but doesn't use it.

Clinton uses his all the time.

Rudd is one.

Mickey Mouse has an unusual one.

Liberace never used his on women.

Jerry Seinfeld is very, very proud of his.

Cher claims that she took on 3.

We never saw Lucy use Desi's.

What is it?


***************************























The answer is: 'A Last Name.'

[Magz]

THIS IS CLEVER............*****Don't click on any of the items in the picture, just wait a few seconds and see what happens******



HEMA is a Dutch department store. The first store opened on November 4, 1926, in Amsterdam . Now there are 150 stores all over the Netherlands .


Take a look at HEMA's product page. You can't order anything and it's in Dutch, but just wait a couple of seconds and watch what happens.


This company has a sense of humour and a great computer programmer.

Go here http://producten.hema.nl/

[exentix]

wow thats cool 

[Krandall]

A funeral procession makes its way down the road. Six close members of the family are carrying the coffin between them, and on top of the casket is a fishing line, a net and some bait.

A passerby remarks: "He must have been a very keen fisherman."

"Oh, he still is," replies a local. "He's off to the river as soon as they've buried his wife!"

[Magz]

Alzheimer's Test

How fast can you guess these words?

1. F_ _K
2. PU_S_
3. S_X
4. P_N_S
5. BOO_S
6. _ _NDOM























Answers:

1. FORK
2. PULSE
3. SIX
4. PANTS
5. BOOKS
6. RANDOM

You got all 6 wrong....didn't you?

[Magz]

0 out of 6....

Ohh well..... F_ _ K T_ _ S

LOL

[Krandall]

I got 1 out of 6.

[Krandall]

The man told his doctor that he wasn't able to do all the things around the house that he used to do. When the examination was complete, he said: "Doc, I can take it. Tell me in plain English what's wrong with me."

"Well, in plain English," the doctor replied, "you're just lazy."

"OK," said the man, "Now give me the medical term so I can tell my wife."

[Krandall]

An old man gets on a crowded bus and no one gives him a seat. As the bus shakes and rattles down the road, the old man's cane slips on the floor and he falls down.

As he gets up, a 7-year-old kid, sitting nearby, turns to him and says: "If you put a little rubber thingy on the end of your stick, it wouldn't slip."

The old man snaps back: "If your daddy did the same thing seven years ago, I would have a seat today!"

[Krandall]

A tired doctor was awakened by a phone call in the middle of the night.

"Please, you have to come right over," pleaded the distraught young mother, "My child has swallowed a condom."

The physician dressed quickly, but before he could get out the door, the phone rang again.

"You don't have to come over after all," the woman said with a sigh of relief, "My husband just found another one."

[socalrappy700]

A lady about 8 months pregnant got on a bus. She noticed the man opposite her was smiling at her. She immediately moved to another seat. This time the smile turned into a grin, so she moved again. The man seemed more amused. When on the fourth move, the man burst out laughing, she complained to the driver and he had the man arrested.

The case came up in court.

The judge asked the man (about 20 years old) what he had to say for himself.

The man replied, 'Well your Honor, it was like this, when the lady got on the bus, I couldn't help but notice her condition. She sat down under a sign that said, 'The Double Mint Twins are coming' and I grinned. Then she moved and sat under a sign that said, ' Logan 's Liniment will reduce the swelling,' and I had to smile. Then she placed herself under a deodorant sign that said, 'William's Big Stick Did the Trick,' and I could hardly contain myself. But, Your Honor, when She moved the fourth time and sat under a sign that said, 'Goodyear Rubber could have prevented this Accident'... I just lost it.'

'CASE DISMISSED!!'

[Colorado700R]

[Magz]

Godd memories...............


Cowboy walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in
his arms and says, "Honey, this is the cow I make
love to when you have a headache."

The wife, lying in the bed reading a book, looks up
and says, "If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know
that's a sheep, not a cow."

The cowboy replies, "If you weren't such a
presumptuous bitch, you'd realize I was talking to
the sheep."

[Peelz]

Godd memories...............


Cowboy walks into the bedroom carrying a sheep in
his arms and says, "Honey, this is the cow I make
love to when you have a headache."

The wife, lying in the bed reading a book, looks up
and says, "If you weren't such an idiot, you'd know
that's a sheep, not a cow."

The cowboy replies, "If you weren't such a
presumptuous bitch, you'd realize I was talking to
the sheep."

 

[Krandall]

that's hilarious!