Post some good jokes here!!!!

[Krandall]

A wife asks her husband: "What do you like most in me, my pretty face or my sexy body?"

He looks at her from head to toe and replied: “I like your sense of humor!”

[Magz]

Ricky has broken his leg and his budd Mick comes over to see him. Mick says "So, How you doing?" Ricky says "ok, but do me a favor pal, run upstairs and get me my slippers, My feet are freezing".
Mick goes upstairs and sees Ricky's gorgeous 19-year old daughters lying on the bed naked. He says "your dad sent me up here to have sex with both of you". They say "Prove it"
So Mick shouts downstairs "Ricky, both of em?" Ricky shouts back "Of course both of em', Whats the point of f*****g one?"

[Krandall]

[Magz]

A koala walks into a bar one night, slams his paw down on the table, and orders a drink. When he's done, slam goes his paw again for more. This goes on for about half an hour, and just when he was going to do it again, the barkeep told him if he was looking for a good time, there was some one in the back room who could help him, the koala decides why not and goes into the back room. There he meets a prostitute who is waiting for him. That night he has the best sex he has ever had. After the prostitute turns to the koala and says, "How about my money," the koala looked confused and the prostitute brought out a dictionary and it said...PROSTITUTE: Has sex for money.

So in response the koala turn to the definition for the koala and it says. KOALA: Eats bush and leaves.

[Magz]

this one made me  pretty good.

A little girl goes to the barber shop with her father. She stands next to
the barber chair while her dad gets his hair cut....she is eating a snack
cake... the barber smiles at her and says, "Sweetheart, you're gonna get
hair on your twinkie."

"I know, "she replies. "I'm gonna get boobies, too."

[Magz]

How I lost the trivia contest:



I lost the Trivia Contest at our country club last night by 1 point.

Not only got the last question wrong, but was immediately asked to leave.

The question was: "Where do women have the curliest hair?"






Apparently the correct answer is Fiji.

[Magz]

My Neighbors, the lesbians next door, asked me what I would like for my birthday.
I was quite surprised when they gave me a Rolex.



It was very nice of them, but I think they misunderstood me when I said, "I wanna watch."

[Krandall]

How I lost the trivia contest:



I lost the Trivia Contest at our country club last night by 1 point.

Not only got the last question wrong, but was immediately asked to leave.

The question was: "Where do women have the curliest hair?"






Apparently the correct answer is Fiji.

[Gunz]

Ricky has broken his leg and his budd Mick comes over to see him. Mick says "So, How you doing?" Ricky says "ok, but do me a favor pal, run upstairs and get me my slippers, My feet are freezing".
Mick goes upstairs and sees Ricky's gorgeous 19-year old daughters lying on the bed naked. He says "your dad sent me up here to have sex with both of you". They say "Prove it"
So Mick shouts downstairs "Ricky, both of em?" Ricky shouts back "Of course both of em', Whats the point of f*****g one?"

OMGoodness!!!!!!

[Magz]

A 5-year-old boy went to visit his grandmother one day. Playing with his toys in her bedroom while grandma was dusting, he looked up and said, Grandma, how come you don't have a boyfriend now that Grandpa went to heaven?
Grandma replied, Honey, my TV is my boyfriend. I can sit in my bedroom and watch it all day long. The religious programs make me feel good and the comedies make me laugh. I'm happy with my TV as my boyfriend.
Grandma turned on the TV, and the reception was terrible. She started adjusting the knobs, trying to get the picture in focus. Frustrated, she started hitting the backside of the TV hoping to fix the problem.
The little boy heard the doorbell ring, so he hurried to open the door, and there stood Grandma's minister.
The minister said, Hello, son, is your Grandma home?
The little boy replied, Yeah, she's in the bedroom banging her boyfriend.
The minister fainted!

[dick-84]

LMAO!!!! 

[Krandall]

[Peelz]

LMAO!!!! 

and...whom might you be?

[dick-84]

LMAO!!!! 

and...whom might you be?

Im really not sure.

[Spartan]

ADULT SEX QUIZ

Q.) What doesn't belong in this list: Meat, Eggs, Wife, Blowjob?
A.) Blowjob: You can beat your meat, eggs, or wife,but you can't
beat a blowjob.

Q.) Why does a penis have a hole in the end?
A.) So men can be open minded.

Q.) What's the speed limit of sex?
A.) 68 because at 69 you have to turn around.

Q.) What do a Rubix cube and a penis have in common?
A.) The longer you play with them, the harder they get.

Q.) What's the difference between your paycheck and your dick?
A.) You don't have to beg your wife to blow your paycheck!

Q.) Three words to ruin a man's ego...
A.) "Is it in?"

Q.) What do you get when you cross Raggedy Ann and the Pillsbury
Dough Boy?
A.) A red headed bitch with a yeast infection.

Q.) How can you tell when an auto mechanic just had sex?
A.) One of his fingers is clean.

Q.) What do you do with 365 used rubbers?
A.) Melt them down make a tire, and call it a Goodyear.

Q.) What do bungee jumping and hookers have in common?
A.) They both cost a hundred bucks and if the rubber breaks,
you're screwed.